ARE YOU BEING FOLLOWED?

Are You Being Followed?

By James Smith

1Th 1:6  “And ye became followers of us, and of the Lord, having received the word in much affliction, with joy of the Holy Ghost:”
A young upstart in the ministry once asked an elder more seasoned minister, "When will I know that I am leader in the Church?"  With that the seasoned minister responded simply, “When you are being followed.”
Leadership in God’s church is not position.  It is not having or being in an office.  Being elected by a group of people neither actually causes you to become their leader.  They may have elected or chosen you to do a job, but that does not mean that you are their leader.  Leadership only happens in the church when you are being followed. 
Jesus’ followers literally followed him through deserts, mountains, and stormy seas.  No obstacle was too great for the opportunity to be near to the master.  Here is where many church leaders find out if they’ve made the grade or not.  One statistic tells us that very often after a building program, many pastors too often leave a church to find another pastorate.  Why is that?  Could it be that the parishioners didn’t like the color of the paint the pastor chose?  Did they not like the way he conducted the business of the project?  Was too much money spent?  Too little accomplished?  Wrong decisions?  Bad decisions?  A leader will know if he is truly a leader if he followed even after a storm.
When Jesus’ followers were in the ship that was being tossed by the waves, they cried out to their leader and he healed the situation they were in.  Here is where an elected person becomes a leader of people.  Knowing what to do in the storm will validate your leadership.  Knowing how to act in a crisis elevates you above your fellow.  Not everybody is capable of making tough decisions.   Only a leader worth following knows when and how to step to the forefront and take charge of a chaotic situation.
Great leaders are not born.  They are not elected.  They are developed.  What made Jesus the greatest leader of people of all time was His desire to sacrifice Himself for the sake of those who followed Him.  People will follow those who are self sacrificing.  They will lean towards those who put the good of the people first and foremost. 
People will never follow a leader who is self-serving for long.  Self-serving leaders are thieves of the people.  They take without giving.  They demand when they themselves offer nothing. 
Are you being followed?  When you look behind you, do you see people who’s lives are being shaped by your example?  Do you see other leaders coming up under your ministry?  Are there people who would follow you anywhere you went?  Would they follow you through a stormy sea or a hot desert experience?  If so, you are truly a leader.  If not, you may need to ask yourself some important questions.
The answer to these questions lay within yourself.  A leader who is not truly being followed can never blame others for not following him.  Nor can he demand them to follow.  People will only follow those they trust.  They will only follow those they respect.  They will not go very far with someone who hurts them or treats them small.  However, they will go to any length and give any amount to someone who has earned their trust, respect and love.
For some leaders this kind of followership happens very quickly.  For others, it takes a lifetime.  The adversities that a congregation goes through and the response of it’s leaders may well be the determining factor here.
Would you follow you?  Think about this for a moment.  What kind of leadership have you followed in the past?  What did you require from those you followed after?  Do you have those same traits?   Do you have a similar character?  Are you being followed?

Fw: [New post] Fingering Church Powerbrokers

--- On Mon, 6/11/12, Restoring Kingdom Builders <donotreply@wordpress.com> wrote: From: Restoring Kingdom Builders <donotreply@wordpress.com> Subject: [New post] Fingering Church Powerbrokers To: elijahmutua97@yahoo.com Date: Monday, June 11, 2012, 9:49 PM New post on Restoring Kingdom Builders Fingering Church Powerbrokers by Jim Meyer My pastor was under attack. He couldn't sleep.  He couldn't study.  His personality turned inward. He was a wreck. Why? Years ago, in my third church staff position, a small group of vocal members began to criticize the church's pastor ... who was also my supervisor. Their main claim?  That he didn't preach often enough, an indication that he was lazy. 35 years ago, many Protestant churches had: *Sunday School *Sunday morning worship *Sunday evening service (with youth group meetings before or after) *Wednesday night prayer meeting That's a lot of teaching time to fill! My pastor's main gift was shepherding - not teaching - so he utilized a team of teachers on Sunday nights and Wednesday nights.  I was happy with the arrangement because I enjoyed hearing others speak ... and because I got to speak once a month as well. I can't recall what set off the grumbling, but many of us started feeling heightened anxiety around the church campus.  One night, someone caught me in the parking lot and told me that 10% of the church was going to leave if the pastor didn't start preaching on Sunday nights. Now what would you do with that information? Some Christians would keep it to themselves. Some would tell family and friends from the church. Some would throw in their lot with the 10%. Honestly, I wasn't sure what to do. I had a friend in the church - a man who went on to become an evangelist - and he and I discussed the situation.  We decided to visit the most influential man in the church ... a layman known for his teaching, integrity, and straight talk. My friend and I sat in his living room and said something like this, "There are people in this church who are attacking the pastor.  They are threatening to leave if he doesn't start preaching on Sunday nights.  The pastor is devastated by this news and seems paralyzed to do anything about the situation.  What can we do to help him?" Looking back, I don't know whether or not this man was supportive of the pastor, but we had to take the risk. He told us, "Gentlemen, when Paul talked about troublemakers in the church, he named names.  Who are these people?" Wait a minute.  If we mention the names, isn't that gossip?  Aren't we tattling?  Couldn't we get in trouble if we said too much about what was happening? And some of those people were our friends.  How could we single out friends like that? But this man was right.  Paul did name names - along with John, the apostle of love: Some have rejected these and so have shipwrecked their faith.  Among them are Hymenaeus and Alexander, whom I have handed over to Satan to be taught not to blaspheme.  1 Timothy 1:19-20 Their teaching will spread like gangrene.  Among them are Hymenaeus and Philetus, who have wandered away from the truth.  They say that the resurrection has already taken place, and they destroy the faith of some.  2 Timothy 2:17-18 Alexander the metalworker did me a great deal of harm.  The Lord will repay him for what he has done.  You too should be on your guard against him, because he strongly opposed our message.  2 Timothy 4:14-15 I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to be first, will have nothing to do with us.  So if I come, I will call attention to what he is doing, gossiping maliciously about us.  Not satisfied with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers.  He also stops those who want to do so and puts them out of the church.  3 John 9-10 With biblical precedent upholding us, my friend and I divulged the names of the troublemakers we knew about - especially the ringleaders. I learned an important lesson that day.  Sometimes church powerbrokers are successful in making threats and demands because nobody has the courage to identify them by name. Think about this: Last night, my wife and I watched a recently-produced film on Solomon's life.  The film opens with King David near death - but he hadn't yet chosen his successor. So one of David's sons engaged in a pre-emptive attempt to be anointed as king -  in league with David's top general. Their names?  Adonijah and Joab. Not "one of David's sons" - but Adonijah. Not "a high-ranking military officer" - but Joab. They were both executed for committing treason against David's choice for king ... Solomon. One of Jesus' 12 disciples betrayed him. His name?  Judas from Kerioth. Not just "one of the Twelve" - but Judas. Before anyone could finger him, Judas took his own life. Paul wrote in Romans 16:17: I urge you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned.  Keep away from them. If you're in a church, and you hear that someone is plotting against your pastor ... do something about it. Warn the pastor.  If you sense the board is supportive, talk to the board member you know and trust best. Believe me, the pastor and/or board may have no idea of any division inside the ranks.  Your information may give them time to head off an attack before it ever takes place ... or give them a key piece of information they lacked. If you know that an individual or a group is planning on "going after" your pastor, speak to someone in authority - even if the plotters are your friends. Because if you don't, your church will eventually experience months of tension, division, and ugliness.  Friends will separate, donations will plunge, and people will leave. If you know something, tell somebody! Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins.  James 4:17 Jim Meyer | June 11, 2012 at 2:49 pm | Categories: Church Conflict, Church Health, Conflict with Antagonists, Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with the Pastor, Fighting Evil | URL: http://wp.me/p1dBN6-vL Comment    See all comments Unsubscribe or change your email settings at Manage Subscriptions. Trouble clicking? Copy and paste this URL into your browser: http://blog.restoringkingdombuilders.org/2012/06/11/fingering-church-powerbrokers/ Thanks for flying with WordPress.com

Fw: [New post] Blaming Others for My Mistakes, Part 2

----- Forwarded Message -----
From: Restoring Kingdom Builders <donotreply@wordpress.com>
To: elijahmutua97@yahoo.com
Sent: Wednesday, June 6, 2012 12:02 PM
Subject: [New post] Blaming Others for My Mistakes, Part 2

New post on Restoring Kingdom Builders Blaming Others for My Mistakes, Part 2 by Jim Meyer I once got thrown out of Dodger Stadium. It's true. When I was in eighth grade, my uncle took his son, my brother and me to a Dodgers-Mets game at Chavez Ravine.  It was the last Friday game of the season, Game 160. We sat where we always sat at Dodger Stadium: in the general admission deck at the very top of the stadium.  Back then, I think it cost 75 cents for a kid to sit there. My brother, cousin and I all sat in the front row of the top deck.  My uncle sat a few rows back. The Dodgers weren't very good that year, and the game was boring.  My brother and cousin would do anything on a dare, so I dared them to do something. Expectorate over the railing and try and hit a certain bald guy in the head. The two of them tried to hit him.  Oh, how they tried.  And when the guy below turned around and looked up at them, they pulled back and hid their faces. But when he angrily stormed up the aisle - presumably in search of an usher or a policeman - the three of us hid in the men's bathroom ... where we were quickly caught ... and discharged from the stadium. My uncle was not happy. "Honestly, I didn't do it.  I didn't do anything.  They did it all." But I suggested the idea ... even if no fluids ever left my mouth. I certainly bore at least some responsibility for our having to leave the ballpark that night ... and I never tried a stunt like that again. Does my little story have a familiar ring?  Remember what happened in the Garden after the first couple ate from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil? Adam told God, "The woman you put here with me - she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it." Eve told the Lord, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate." Wanting to maintain the illusion of perfection ... before both God and each other ... the parents of humanity did not claim any responsibility for their sinfulness.  They chose to say instead, "She's the one to blame!" and "The devil made me do it." The two stories above are just a microcosm of what's happening today in our culture. A woman hates everyone ... and blames her parents for her isolation even though they've been dead for years. A man gets divorced ... and blames his wife for her controlling ways. A boss gets reprimanded ... and blames three of his subordinates for all his troubles. A church member is corrected for gossipping ... and blames her misbehavior on her husband. A president is overwhelmingly elected ... and still blames many of his problems on the previous administration. Maybe the woman's parents were abusive ... and the man's wife was controlling ... and the boss' employees were problems ... and the pastor did overreact a bit ... and the previous president did leave things in a mess. But does this mean that the accusers bear no responsibility for their failures? Thirty years ago - can it be? - in his classic work The Road Less Traveled, Scott Peck wrote a chapter called "Neuroses and Character Disorders."  Peck writes: "Most people who come to see a psychiatrist are suffering from what is called either a neurosis or a character disorder.  Put most simply, these two conditions are disorders of responsibility, and as such they are opposite styles of relating to the world and its problems.  The neurotic assumes too much responsibility; the person with a character disorder not enough.  When neurotics are in conflict with the world they automatically assume that they are at fault.  When those with character disorders are in conflict with the world they automatically assume that the world is at fault." The statistics indicate that an increasing number of people are developing character disorders.  They fail to take responsibility for their actions, blaming others for their misbehavior. When I was a pastor, I suspected that some of the people I had difficulties with had character disorders.  The tipoff was that they would never admit that they made a mistake or did anything wrong.  Even when they were caught redhanded telling a lie, they didn't say what I heard them say. In other words, it was all my fault. It's one thing to deal with someone with a character disorder occasionally at church.  It's another thing to have a person with this condition as your parent, your boss, or your spouse. Peck concludes his brilliant chapter this way: "When character-disordered individuals blame someone else - a spouse, a child, a friend, a parent, an employer - or something else - bad influences, the schools, the government, racism, sexism, society, the 'system' - for their problems, these problems persist.  Nothing has been accomplished.  By casting away their responsibility they may feel comfortable themselves, but they have ceased to solve the problems of living, have ceased to grow spiritually, and have become dead weight for society." If you recognize such a person in your life, how can you relate to them? First, realize you cannot get close to them.  We can only become close with people who display authenticity.  If you admit a weakness in your life to this person, don't expect them to reciprocate.  They will disappoint you because they cannot be vulnerable. Second, avoid working with them if at all possible.  When things go poorly, guess what?  They'll blame you as a way of diverting the spotlight away from themselves. Third, understand that you cannot work for them.  Some supervisors are sociopathic.  (There's a lot of literature online about this problem.)  They charm their superiors while demeaning those who work underneath them ... and divert any and all responsibility for failure to those they supervise.  When they make a mistake, they find someone else to blame.  It's a sickness, and it can't be resolved through prayer, office politics, or going to HR.  You can either quit, seek a transfer, or visit a counselor. Finally, realize that people with character disorders will not change.  Why not?  Because somewhere along the line, they stopped taking responsibility for their choices.  Neurotics can change because they take responsibility - albeit too much - for their lives.  But people with character disorders are frozen in immaturity.  They may have the intellect of someone 42, but they'll forever have the emotional intelligence of someone 13. My guess is that you have a co-worker, a neighbor, an acquaintance, a supervisor, or a family member in this category.  Pray for them ... and protect yourself and your family from them. Imagine that you and the team you're leading at church fail to meet a project deadline. A healthy person does not say, "I'm 100% innocent ... and my team is 100% to blame." A healthy person does not say, "I'm 100% to blame ... and no one else bears any responsibility but me." The healthy person says, "I bear some responsibility for that mess-up.  Others do as well.  But I'm going to admit my part first ... whether or not others admit theirs.  And I'm going to learn from this experience and not repeat my mistakes." Our Savior said it perfectly in Matthew 7:3-5: "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?  How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?  You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Jim Meyer | June 6, 2012 at 12:02 pm | Tags: character disorders, Dodger Stadium, Matthew 7:3-5, neurotics, Scott Peck, The Road Less Traveled | Categories: Church Conflict, Church Health, Conflict with Antagonists, Current Church Issues, Fighting Evil | URL: http://wp.me/p1dBN6-vC Comment    See all comments Unsubscribe or change your email settings at Manage Subscriptions. Trouble clicking? Copy and paste this URL into your browser: http://blog.restoringkingdombuilders.org/2012/06/06/blaming-others-for-my-mistakes-part-2/ Thanks for flying with WordPress.com